The Leadership Presence Coaching Model

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question might be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there is a true injunction at the bottom of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It’s that if you do not organize yourself properly, you’ll pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you now, and you may say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not true. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you will care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it is very rare that you can find somebody who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this sort of pain is one of those things that brings the idea that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question may be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to that, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It’s something like, look around for something which bothers you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do it in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you have to ask yourself this, right? It is not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there’s a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there would be a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there is some crap behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the room would be marginally better if it was somewhat less dusty and the wires, were not all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you let yourself just to think about the expanse where you exist at the moment, there will be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it that you can just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you’re coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do first would just be to get you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends upon how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life will be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to fix the things you repeat daily, because people usually think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines that you go through every day. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out immediately. So a hundred adjustments to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there is a great deal less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and once you’re acting out that, then it is possible to extend what you’re willing to consider yourself itself and start fixing up the things that are part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there’s this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for a decade. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to fix that. You just walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it’s very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it’s you right then and there, which should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter which is not working and just begin tinkering away with it. You need to stay in your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the idea of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a very strange thing. The moment you give it a name, a real aim, it’ll reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That’s really how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a job, especially you have to be real about it, which is why you must bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you must get them on your body. So you’re acting consistently. You have to be genuine about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the world will reconfigure itself about that goal, which is extremely strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of that, you’ve all seen this video where you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and don’t see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you’re able to get one thing through your head and as a result of even being in college, that would be a good one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the right thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and that means you don’t need to take anythingthat specific phrase too far, you need to bind it with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it’s still a terrific thing to ask.