New Life Story Coaching

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question may be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there’s a real injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It’s that if you do not arrange yourself properly, you’ll pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you now, and you may say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not correct. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you may care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it’s very rare that you can find somebody who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this sort of pain is one of those things that brings the idea that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question may be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something that disturbs you and see if you’re able to fix it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do this in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you need to ask yourself this, right? It’s not a command. It is like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there are a fantastic thing. And you know, you have not, there is some crap behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the room would be marginally better if it was a little less dusty and the wires, weren’t all tangled up the same way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse where you exist at that moment, there will be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it that you could just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you were coming to see me for childbirth, this easiest thing for us to do first would just be for you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends upon how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life will be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat daily, because people usually think of those as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you have your routines that you go through every day. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t have to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out right away. So a hundred adjustments to your wider domain of being, and there’s a lot less crap and there’s a lot less rubbish around it.

A good deal fewer traps that you step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and as soon as you’re acting out that, then it is possible to extend what you’re willing to consider yourself and begin fixing up the things which are part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there is this guy who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for a decade. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be useful if you could repair it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to repair that. You just walk around that and go find something that you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it is very likely that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it is you right then and there, which should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter that isn’t working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to remain within your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your mind is a really strange thing. As soon as you give it a name, a real aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with this goal. That is actually how you see to begin with. And so if you set it a job, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, and that’s why you must bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you have to get them on your body. So you are acting consistently. You have to be real about the aim, but once you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself about that goal, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of this, you have all seen this video in which you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and don’t see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for around five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you’re able to get one thing through your head and as a result of even being in college, that would be a good one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative way, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the right thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and that means you don’t want to take anythingthat particular phrase too far, you want to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it’s still a great thing to ask.