Coaching Leadership Style Disadvantages

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question may be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there is a real injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It’s that if you do not arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you now, and you may say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not true. You truly do care about that because if you are in pain, you will care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it is very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this form of pain is one of those things that brings the notion that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to this, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something that bothers you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do this in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a space, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you need to ask yourself that, right? It’s not a command. It is like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there would be a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there is some rubbish behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be marginally better if it was a little less dusty and the wires, weren’t all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it which you can just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you’re coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do first would just be for you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you can begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, that you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life will be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat every day, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through daily. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to listen to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out immediately. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there is a great deal less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and once you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re willing to consider yourself and begin fixing up the things which are part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there is this man who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for 10 years. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be good if you could repair it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to fix that. You just walk around that and go find something you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it is very probable that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter that isn’t working and just begin tinkering away with it. You need to stay within your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the idea of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your mind is a really strange thing. The moment you give it a name, a genuine aim, it’ll reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That’s actually how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be real about it, which is the reason why you have to bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you have to get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You have to be real about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself around that goal, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of that, you have all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and do not see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for around five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you can get one thing through your head and as a consequence of even being in college, that would be a good one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and that means you don’t want to take anything, even that particular phrase too far, you need to bind it together with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it’s still a great thing to ask.