Coach Style Leadership Strength

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question might be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there’s a real injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It’s that if you do not arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you today, and you could say, well, I do not care about that, but that is actually not correct. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you will care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it’s very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this sort of pain is one of those things that brings the idea that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It’s something like, look around for something that bothers you and see if you’re able to fix it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do it in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room just like a space, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I have to do?

And you need to ask yourself that, right? It is not a command. It’s like a real question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there is a heap of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there would be a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some rubbish behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be slightly better if it was somewhat less dusty and the cables, were not all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you let yourself just to consider the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it that you can just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you’re coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do would just be for you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say start where you can start.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life will be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat every day, because people tend to think of those as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you’ve got your routines that you go through every day. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to listen to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out immediately. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there is a great deal less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and as soon as you’re acting that out, then you can extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself itself and start fixing up the things that are a part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there is this man who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for 10 years. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be useful if you could repair it, but you, have not got a clue about how to fix that. You simply walk around that and go find something that you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it’s very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter which isn’t working and just begin tinkering away with it. You need to stay in your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your mind is a very strange thing. The moment you give it a title, a real aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That is really how you see to start with. And so if you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, and that’s why you must bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you have to get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You have to be real about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself around that aim, which is extremely strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of this, you have all seen this video in which you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and do not see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you can get one thing through your head and as a result of even being in college, that would be a great one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative way, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to decrease everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there is a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and so you don’t need to take anythingthat particular phrase too much, you want to bind it with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it is still a terrific thing to ask.