Coach K Duke Leadership

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question might be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there’s a true injunction at the bottom of it. It is not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you do not arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you today, and you could say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not correct. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you may care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it is very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this form of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question may be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to that, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something which bothers you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do it in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room like a space, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I must do?

And you have to ask yourself that, right? It’s not a command. It is like a genuine question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there are a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some crap behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be marginally better if it was somewhat less dusty and the wires, weren’t all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to consider the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there will be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it which you could just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you’re coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do would just be for you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say begin where you can start.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, that you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to fix the things you repeat daily, because people usually think of those as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines that you go through daily. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t have to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out right away. So a hundred alterations to your broader domain of being, and there’s a lot less rubbish and there’s a lot less rubbish around it.

A good deal fewer traps that you step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and as soon as you’re acting that out, then you can extend what you’re willing to consider yourself and start fixing up the things which are part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there’s this man who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for 10 years. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be good if you could repair it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to repair that. You simply walk around that and go find something that you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it’s very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it is you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter that isn’t working and just begin tinkering away with it. You need to remain within your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a really strange thing. As soon as you give it a title, a genuine aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with this goal. That is really how you see to start with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be real about it, which is why you have to bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you have to get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You’ve got to be real about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself around that aim, which is very strange. And it’s, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of that, you have all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and don’t see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for around five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you’re able to get 1 thing through your head and as a consequence of even being in college, that would be a great one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative way, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to reduce everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t need to take anythingthat particular phrase too far, you want to bind it with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it is still a great thing to ask.