African American Life Coach Los Angeles

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question might be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there’s a true injunction at the base of it. It’s not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you do not arrange yourself properly, you’ll pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you today, and you could say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not true. You truly do care about that because if you are in pain, you may care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it is very rare you could find somebody who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this form of pain is one of those things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to that, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It’s something like, look around for something that disturbs you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do it in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room like a space, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you need to ask yourself this, right? It’s not a command. It is like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, like there’s a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there are a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some rubbish behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the room would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the cables, weren’t all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you let yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at the moment, there will be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it which you could just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you were coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do first would just be to get you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends upon how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say begin where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat every day, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you’ve got your routines that you go through every day. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out right away. So a hundred adjustments to your broader domain of being, and there’s a lot less crap and there’s a lot less rubbish around it.

A good deal fewer traps that you step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and as soon as you’re acting that out, then you can extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself and start fixing up the things which are part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there’s this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for a decade. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, have not got a clue about how to repair that. You just walk around that and go find something you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it is very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter which isn’t working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to remain within your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it is partly because your mind is a really strange thing. As soon as you give it a name, a genuine aim, it’ll reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That is really how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you have to be genuine about it, which is the reason why you must bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you have to get them on your body. So you’re acting consistently. You’ve got to be real about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the world will reconfigure itself around that goal, which is extremely strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video in which you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and do not see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for about five years, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you can get 1 thing through your head and as a consequence of even being in university, that would be a good one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to decrease everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there is a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and that means you don’t want to take anything, even that specific phrase too much, you need to bind it with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it is still a great thing to ask.