A Leadership Coaching Program

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question may be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there is a real injunction at the bottom of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It is that if you do not organize yourself properly, you’ll pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you today, and you may say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not true. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you will care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it’s very rare that you can find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this sort of pain is one of those things that brings the idea that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It is something like, look around for something which disturbs you and see if you can repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do this in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a space, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I have to do?

And you have to ask yourself that, right? It is not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, just like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there are a fantastic thing. And you know, you have not, there’s some crap behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the wires, were not all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to consider the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it that you can just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you’re coming to see me for psychotherapy, this easiest thing for us to do would just be to get you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say start where you can begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, that you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat every day, because people usually think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through every day. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out immediately. So a hundred adjustments to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there is a great deal less crap around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and as soon as you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re willing to consider yourself and start fixing up the things that are part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there’s this man who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for 10 years. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, have not got a clue about how to fix that. You just walk around that and go find something that you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it is very likely that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it’s you right then and there, which should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter that isn’t working and just start tinkering away with it. You need to remain in your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your mind is a very strange thing. The moment you give it a name, a real aim, it’ll reconfigure the world in keeping with this goal. That is really how you see to start with. And so if you set it a task, especially you have to be real about it, which is the reason why you have to bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you must get them on your body. So you are acting consistently. You’ve got to be genuine about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself around that aim, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and don’t see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for around five years, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you can get 1 thing through your head and as a result of even being in university, that would be a good one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative way, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the right thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to decrease everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there is a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and that means you don’t need to take anything, even that particular phrase too much, you need to bind it together with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it’s still a great thing to ask.